
Guy talk alert!
I rarely talk about sports on this blog, because I usually like to limit my rants to social issues and politics. Not that I don't get passionate about sports. It's just that unlike politics and world affairs, it's not exactly life or death we are talking about. Unless, of course, you happen to live in Philly.
Lately in our fair city and damn near everywhere else sports is talked about in A-merry-ca, the topic of the discussion has been the quarterback of our football team. (Or as we affectionately call him: "Five".) Now it seems that "Five" has gone and put his foot in his mouth He declared, after a pathetic tie with the Cincinnati BUNG-LES, that he did not think that there could be a tie in the NFL. A not too bright statement to be sure, but not the end of the free world as we know it. Honestly, "Five" not knowing whether or not there were ties in the NFL wasn't going to affect the outcome of the game. Not with our genius of a coach calling the plays. (HEY ANDY, HERE IS A NEWSFLASH FOR YA: IF YOU CAN'T CONVERT A 4TH AND 1 TO BEAT THE STINKING BUN-GLES, YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE COACHING IN THIS LEAGUE). Whew. See why I don't like to talk sports?) The truth of the matter is that the Eagles just aren't that good this year. But this post isn't even about what kind of team the Eagles are at this point in the season. No, it's about the backlash and the heat that "Five" has been taking in this city and elsewhere because of his misstatement. (Tiki Barber needs to shut the fuck up, because the last time I checked, the G Men didn't win a ring until his black ass left) John Smallwood, one of the biggest sports writers here, called it "one of the most embarrassing gaffes in recent sports history" Huh? Mr. Smallwood, just what the hell have you been smoking? How is it a sports gaffe when it didn't affect the outcome of the stinking game? For gaffes see Chris Weber's time out when they had none left which cost Michigan an NCAA championship game to North Carolina. See Brett Favre's interception in last year's NFC Championship game to end it. See Bill Buckner's infamous error in 1986 which cost Red Sox Nation a World Series. Those are sports gaffes Mr. Smallwood, not knowing how the overtime rule works in the NFL.
The devil must be wearing ear muffs and gloves today, because I actualy agree with Jason Whitlock's take on this story. Donovan has been a class act on and off the field, and is the best quarterback this city has ever had (and I loved me some Randall), so why kill the guy for this foot in mouth moment? Is he a little soft and somewhat of a mama's boy? Yes. Does he choke at times in the clutch? Yes. Do I wish he would use his legs and create match up problems for defenses like he used to? Yes. But having said all of that, he is still a pretty damn good quarterback, and this city, in spite of the buffoons on sports talk radio (more on them in a minute) should be glad to have him. The truth is, that "Five" has a better winning percentage, more playoff wins, and more playoff appearances than both Peyton Manning and Carson Palmer, all while playing with the dregs that the Eagles provided him with (except for the one glorious year when we had T.O.)throughout the years.
Now these idiots on sports talk here in our city are all over the guy. Forget the fact that he is not the only player in the NFL who has this little rule problem. Yeah yeah yeah, I know he is the quarterback, and he should know better. But I bet McNabb has forgotten more football than these dopes ever knew. All these clowns do is get up every morning and talk shit about our athletes 24/7, while their fat asses sit behind a microphone and pretend to be Joe Sixpacks, before they cash their own big fat checks. I swear they get on my fucking nerves. They remind me of the kid back in college and high school who couldn't get on the field, and who would always have some negative shit to say after a bad loss. Like they could do any better. What a hustle. Only in A-merry-ca.
But field the guy makes millions of dollars shouldn't he at least know the rules of a game that he is paid handsomely to play? Well, I am a lawyer, and until a few years ago if you had said "nunc pro tunc" to me I would have thought you were talking about a city in China. That is, until I had to file a motion with that very title. This is when I had to learn about it really fast.
I bet half of these so called "journalist" can't even pronounce words like aplomb or vestige, yet they rip a guy for not knowing the rules of a game he plays. I really need a break from these phonies.
Now don't get it twisted, I will be all over "Five" the next time he throws an interception, or chokes during the two minute drill. But I am not going to sit here and act like it's the end of the world because he doesn't know the fucking overtime rule in the NFL. Sorry, it's just not that deep.
"TD or no TD-that is the question: Whether tis nobler in my mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outraged Philadelphians Or to take leave from this sea of trouble..."
Ha ha ha, everybody got jokes. I tell you what won't be funny; having to go 1-15 with the next quarterback who comes in here to guide Andy's sinking ship.

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